Daria Doering

Was feeling at the absolute end of my rope over our out-of-state airbnb for traveling nurses. We recently spent an incredible amount of time, money and energy getting our beloved vintage mansion all fixed up and gorgeous. Then we went through a panic period when it seemed no one was renting rooms. But nurses finally came, and all seemed to be going well.

But the next thing I knew, a guest complained that water was leaking through the ceiling and wall into her bedroom, and sent photos. This was about the worst nightmare I could imagine. I called the plumber who had fixed the leak a year ago. This led to a series of plumbing fixes … and then texts that it was still leaking. Always on a Friday night, which means that plumbing fees are double over the weekend. Luckily the plumber warrantied his work after the first time, though we still haven’t settled with him.

About the third time, he said he would have to cut into the drywall. He cut about a two foot by two foot hole in the ceiling, which finally enabled him to examine the whole drain assembly of the bathroom above, and fix it (overflow valve was the problem). So the plumbing was finally fixed, but there was this huge hole in the ceiling, which would let in cold air and spiders.

Throughout this, I had told the guest who was staying in that room that she could sleep in the other bedroom downstairs, which was vacant. She had been really sweet about bearing with us through all these plumbing problems.

But then she complained that the other bedroom was too hot. Really?? We had worried that it would be too cold, in the severe winters, and had gone to a lot of trouble to make sure the heater vent was fully open.

The next complaint came from another tenant, that our wonderful gardener, who I had enlisted to put a temporary patch over the hole in the ceiling, had not knocked before entering the house, had surprised her, had come in the back door instead of the front, and on and on. I told her that’s why I list all maintenance staff on the first page of the guest book – there will be times when they need to enter the house and guests have slept late or just gotten home from work or whatever, and don’t hear the doorbell.

I sent a text to all staff, reminding them to only enter through the front door, ring the bell and only let themselves in if no one answers, etc. I also called the gardener, who is a gem, especially considering that my biggest problem is always finding and retaining good gardeners. He said he had knocked, and he’s a very respectful person whom I really couldn’t imagine barging in. I told him I was sorry people were so sensitive, and apologized when I heard that the guest had also yelled and sworn at him (which she told me about also).

Then today I got a text from another tenant complaining about ghosts. Seriously. This just felt like too much. I texted her back that Mike and I had lived in that house for months, had never noticed anything out of the ordinary. That the man we bought the house from had grown up in it, was very nice, his family had taken very good care of the house, and I always got fantastic vibes from it. Even when I stayed there alone for a month, right after we bought it. Mike said he had heard sounds at times, but they were from the beautiful trees that surround the house.

Next she texted me a photo of smudges that looked (to her) like ghost “faces” on the window. Told of hearing footsteps. Good grief. This can be serious, if people start rumors, with many of them working at the same facilities.

I keep telling myself that this is something that some day I will look back on and laugh over. But right now, it just feels like something I don’t want to deal with. Not funny. This is all requiring WAY too much management. I spent the evening in tears. I feel like I always have to be the stable adult … only I’m not very stable … it’s a major effort.

Finally I managed to do some reframes, that are helping me tremendously in being at peace with all this.

Before: I feel like people are trying to drive me crazy (complaints, ghosts).

Reframe: I’m glad to be able to be of service to the guests at our airbnb, who are young women away from home. They probably need someone to talk to and some reassurance. I will be happy to provide this, rather than being put out and scared that their complaints are going to ruin my business.

Before: Our airbnb is requiring excessive management.

Reframe: I’m just getting the bugs out of the system. Everything is going wrong in the beginning, but will smooth out.

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